Hello family, friends, and curious passers-by. My name is Adam Christopher Chase (that’s me on the left). I’m 55yrs old and I have polycystic kidney disease. I inherited the illness from my biological father who died of it at the age of 42. I mention this because he made the unusual decision not to receive dialysis or seek a transplant when his kidneys failed, allowing the illness to take its course at an early age. Since I was diagnosed at the age of 30, I’ve spent the last 25yrs trying to better understand his decision and thinking about what I would do when my kidneys began to fail. That time has arrived. I now have End Stage Renal Disease (ESRD) and have begun dialysis this week. I will now be on dialysis three times per week until I receive a transplant.

Doctors tell me that I am a good candidate for a successful transplant due to my age and relative overall health. I have a very loving spouse and children, and friends who are dear to me. My work as a clinical social worker has given me a lifetime of meaningful relationships with people of all ages and backgrounds and I’ve tried to be of some good use in the world. I’ve tried for most of my adult life to be a socially engaged person, advocating for issues of equality and justice. As a cis-gendered straight white man, I’m still learning to understand the many ways in which the culture I’ve lived in has privileged me over those who do not look like me and I’ve fought to change that culture for most of my life.

All in all, I consider myself incredibly fortunate and feel that I owe the world much more than it owes me. I have many reasons to keep going, but asking for help when I’ve already been given so much has been a real struggle for me. In the end, I’ve decided to ask for help so I can continue to honor the commitments I’ve made to many others in my life.

I want to be around for my kids graduating high school and becoming adults. I want to be a good partner to my wife Jennifer, who is one of the most loving and kind people I’ve ever known. I want to survive the pandemic so I can give my mom a hug again. I want to be around for my friends to laugh and cry with. I want to keep showing up for my clients to help heal their wounds. I want to keep fighting for an equitable and just society at a time when that is needed more than ever. And I’d like to enjoy this beautiful, mystifying, sad, complicated world a while longer.